Information overload

I try, like all of you, to live a healthy lifestyle. Nothing is off limits and I really try to practice an everything in moderation philosophy. Our diets are focused on veggies, grains, fruits, a little meat and a little dairy (more for the kids though).
My daughter drinks soy milk because regular milk seems to upset her tummy.
I have some misgivings about the soy milk because of the phytoestrogens, but I can't do almond milk because of allergies and rice milk has double the sugar and 1g of protein to soy's 7 grams.
Plus, rice milk has less fat, a lot less (good for me, bad for babies).
With all of this in mind I have been researching options and obviously coming across information I may or may not need to know.
I read some very very scary facts about dairy. I usually ignore a lot of the "facts" about why we should eliminate whole food groups etc... but this stuff really hit home and made a lot of sense.
My kids (especially my son) eat a lot of dairy and I really think we need to cut it down, drastically.
He has a lot of food allergies, read: most nuts, egg whites, white fish, sesame seeds.
That means no peanut butter or hummus (how he made it in this household I'll never know).
Anyways because of this he always had lots of dairy, cheese sandwiches, yogurt, milk, smoothies with milk.
I don't even know where to begin. Any cheese and yogurt that is not made from cow's milk is made from soy. I'm trying to get rid of the soy too.
I have been overloaded with information and am going through a nothing is healthy, I'm poisoning my kids stage.
Not to mention the whole BPA thing. I've eliminated canned beans and tomatoes because of that.
I don't plan to cut out dairy but I do think it should be limited in the same way I limit meat.
Is there such a thing as an 80% vegan?
Oh btw, I'm trying to limit wheat gluten too... you know the whole GMO thing. Yup I sound like a nutcase.
I did manage a lunch that met my requirements:
Quinoa with oven roasted veggies (broccoli, carrot, mushrooms, zucchini, and chick peas).
That may become a staple.

Do you ever feel like there is just too much "information" out there to have a perfect diet?
I do, I do!!!

Are you a vegan?
Please tell me, what do you eat?